A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men jump out, and the plane crashes anyway.

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I like my women like I like my pancakes: Flipped over, inanimate, motionless, and covered in my syrup.

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A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area.

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whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Buttercups are yellow Thats about it

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"What's uhhh.". "Crap I forget" "Oh yeah! 32!"

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Q- what the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? A- The Wheelchair

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Knock, knock. Who's there? FBI. The female body inspectors? No, the female bawdy inspectors.

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where did susan go durring the explotion? every where...

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What's the difference between you and a cat? The cats mom isn't a whore.

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I really want to wear my Christmas leggings Actually I lied about the leggings, they're tights I love anal

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What happened when a saxophone hit Sally? She had a concussion.

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There once was a man who couldn't finish any sente

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What did the munchy alzhemiers farmer say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators?

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What do you call a black priest? Someone devoted to the word of god

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What's worse than finding out you have cancer? Nothing... (The game.)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Charlie Sheen, Mel Gibson, and Chris Brown all walk into a bar. I don't know what the punchline is, but I'm pretty sure the cops are there.

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A man walked into a metal bar, they were playing Metallica.

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He was. I am sorry, he knows to much, this is for the well being of everyone, including yourself, he will be going down, the order has been given.

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How do you get really high at home? You climb a ladder

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a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

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why did mary fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? Cause she had no friends. Knock knock whos there Definately not mary !

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What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops