What did the bat say to the human? Nothing because bats make too high of frequency noises for humans to understand

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How are cars made? By magic.

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Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

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How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house Purple because ice cream dosnt have bones

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Q:Way C'nt U reed tHis? A: Because im retarted -ian surprenant

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Robin, Get in the Car

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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knock knock a man walks into a bar what do you call a horse with no legs dave who?

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? Probably just one.

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....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

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What did the rapist say before the little girl got in the van? Get in the van

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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what did the cat say to the monkey meow then he got hit by a car

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"Why did the chicken cross the road" "why" "to get to the gay guys house" "knock-knock" "who's there?" "The chicken..."

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he

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So, there's a lion loose in Colchester. Should've gone to Specsavers... [L]

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Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

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why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

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Terrorist jokes make me explode with laughter.

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Your mama's so fat, that at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to diet and exercise before her obesity manifested itself in a variety of chronic afflictions that would detract from her ability to lead a long life.

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In that case you are probably a bit of an outcast as most girls of your beauty are, you know, you are that kind of girl that feels weird because when she got/gets on the buss EVERYONE stares at her, but nobody dares to say anything, right? And when you are hanging out for a drink or something guys stare at you, and go like "nah" which means "Nah she is too good to want me" and starts hitting on your friends instead. Oh and you also get a lot of rude comments from guys "auto disqualifying themselves" like using complements they know will backfire like "Hey wanna fuck sugart1ts? They do this so they can go home with their ego intact thinking "Hey I was tough enough to hit on her, but she turned out to be a bitch! So does any of this sound familiar?

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Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

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A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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