(SPOILER ALERT) The following are a few punchlines: "I didn't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck!" "I can't believe I just blew thirty bucks!" "Hold on buddy, I'm about to save you $10,000" "To get to the other side!" "Because 7, 8, 9!" "She had no arms!" "A fridge!" "I don't have Ferrari in my garage!" "The clown can stay, but the Ferengi in the gorilla suit has to go!" "And if it wasn't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college!" "It was stapled to the chicken!" "I proved it to him." "The holocaust" "Red paint" "A stick." "I wished for a big orange head." "No." "A bicycle is an object and a black man is a human being." "A pilot." "The papa tomato steps on him and says ketchup." "You left your engine running!" "That's what she said." "TV watches you!" "I think so Brain, but where will we get that many cucumbers at this time of night?" "Rectum? Damn near killed him!" "One but it takes two episodes and the bald guy dies."

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's green, and looks like money? Money...

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Butt poop.

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Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

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What do you call an old widow with 12 cats? Forever alone.

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What's Brown and dirty? Dirt

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What did the man say to the other man? Hi

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Q. what sucks A. getting robbed loosing your family and then you die by cancer

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When is Florida not the sunshine state? At night.

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Why did the sheep cry? Because it contracted cancer

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Why did the car stop? The driver had a stroke

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No one walks into a bar... because it was closed.

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Why did John kill Maris? Because Maris killed his family.

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Q: what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? A: A very unfortunate individual.

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Justin Bieber

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What is green and had wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.....

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Who hacks darts? • Jack Nolan aka Bowlbot 300 J-Bowls

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5 people are walking

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Knock, Knock. Come in!

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What did the overweight blind kid get for Christmas? His parents died in a tragic car crash and he was left alone, fat and blind to fend for himself

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops