Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

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So you there Red?

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how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

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What is worse than burning your toast? - Obama

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

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I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

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Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

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How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

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Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

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What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

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The Olympics

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

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Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

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Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Shes been dead for some time now.

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Grammar ... the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

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Why can't humans fly? Because there is simply no natural way of achieving lift with the bodies that we have. We must use other means to become airborne such as planes and hot air balloons.

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pigs are sometimes pink GOSH

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

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On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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