Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible

An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are eating lunch on a bridge. The Mexican drops his taco off the side of the bridge and the Italian and American were kind enough to share some of their lunch with the Mexican making it a successful picnic. Their ethnicity was not relevent at all.

What do you call it when a woman doesn't want the child she is currently impregnated with? Abortion: a very sensitive and controversial topic.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

Rebecca Black starts to sing a song, and when breaking out into her annoying chorus, we realize that it's not about the days of the week.

Where do you go when your friends called you spoiled? Africa.

What do you call a nun who is just walking around? A Roman Catholic

Your mom is so fat that she should watch her weight and maintain a healthy diet.

Why did the little girl drop her school books? A kid jacked her in the head with a brick.

My heart is in my hands. Or maybe it's yours. Either way it's mine now. You won't need it anymore.

why did simran go to jessicas house? To go have a human taco

Train A leaves the station at 1:42 while traveling in 176kmh. How long will it take for the conductor to realize the bridge it ou... Too long.

whats big, black and red all over? My mom when its that time of the month

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

Two pretzels were walking down the street. One was assaulted. The other, witnessing what he'd seen, developed a harsh stereotype.

What did the farmer say to the survivor of the plane crash that just crashed on his land? "Need a band-aid?"

Why was Timmy's hair shaved? He had cancer and was going though Chemo.

How will Jesse die? His mom doesnt have any food left (or money) so she eats him, and then jesse's fat little brother farts on his obese corpse

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally...

what?

What do you do when a dog chews your pen? Use a pencile instead.

JAmie stegman loves making love with his sister... he loves inbreeds so much

If someone tells you to look behind you do you? No

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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