Q: What happened when three lions escaped from the zoo? A: Animal patrol came and tranquilized all three.. Unfortunantly one of the lions died from to much tranq.

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Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because, there are no tailors in the area who make pants suitable for chickens to wear.

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What is the difference between a girl and a woman? Age

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How did superman always save the day? Because he was a fictional tv actor so he could do whatever he wanted to.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because Suzy had no arms.

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an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

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What do gay guys eat? Normal food like every other human being.

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What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

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Whos allergic to BS You R! :D

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Not all black people are skilled at basketball

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Knock Knock Come in.

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? there are no roads in factory farms.

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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This one time at band camp music was played.

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Seargent: Quick seal off all the exits so he cant get away. Private: OK 2 minutes later Private: He escaped sir Seargent: What, how Private: through one of the entrances

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A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

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two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

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whats white and looks like paper paper

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If Chuck Norris had five dollars and YOU had five dollars, he could still punch you in the face for free and get ten dollars out of it.

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Isn't everyday "black tie optional"?

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hy-way is-way is-thay oke-jay pelled-say eird-way? ecause-bay its-way in-way IGLATIN-PAY

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One day a farmer was planting his crops. All of a sudden he was hit by the magic school bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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