What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

Two Irish men walk into a bar, order a drink and sit down to enjoy the drink and friednly conversation.

what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

Yes.

What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue.

Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? In most people who lie eyebrows may raise, eyes may widen and gaze may alter, anal sphincter usually tightens, breathing often quickens marginally, external body temperature alters and sweat (and therefore skin electrical conductivity) increases.

black people. that is all...

A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

How are you this morning?

There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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