Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

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What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

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When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

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Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

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whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing. Hitler died many years ago now and he was in no position of power during Bin Laden's reign of terror due to the fact that he was already dead. Therefore it is impossible that they could have had any sort of conversation. But now Bin Laden is dead as well. HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!

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What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

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What do you do when a bear chases you? Run.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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