Roses are Red Violets are Blue And you will be too when i'm done with ya

Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

Guy 1: Ever heard of Ethiopian food? Guy 2: No habla espanol... Guy 1: Oh....

What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

A horse walks into a bar the barkeeper asks 'Why the long face?' The horse, incapable of speaking English, walked around in a circle, excreated and left.

A man dressed in a white sheet shows up at an African American's door, they sit in the living room drinking coffee and watching the weather.

Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

What happened after a Mexican drank 4 shots? He got drunk and died in a car accident.

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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