what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Wanna know something funny? Your face

thumb_up thumb_down +17

whats difference between womens rights now and 10 years ago? nothing, they are both just lies men tell women to make them feel good.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

"Free to play" Play free "right now"

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Our experimental treatment for Anterograde amnesia has failed. I will inform your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did those sick people do 2 girls 1 cup? me and my sister got bores.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you get when you cross a muslim and a mexican? i don't know, i just thought that this would make an interesting question.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than some one spitting in your food Hitler revealing he's actually a Jew

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: How do you make a black man nervous? A: Threaten to kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

One day a farmer was planting his crops. All of a sudden he was hit by the magic school bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do u stop sky from being gay. You don't

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walked into a bar. He said "ow". Tragic.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is it called when you kill a gay man? Homocide

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the boy with cancer cross the road? He was hoping to get hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

thumb_up thumb_down +15

You're*

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why didnt the kid get anything for christmas? santa exploded

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops