Why did the gambler sell his house? Because he needed money to pay for male hookers.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a man who buys flowers, chocolates, and new jewelry for his wife? A kind, considerate husband.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the psycho killer order for dessert? Ice Cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats the greatest part of buttsex the refrigerators

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why are there so many jokes about germans on Anti-Joke? Because the Germans epitomize the flavour of anti-jokes perfectly and they have the whole nazi history thing going on which is ripe ground for many an anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats the difference between a jewish man wearing a fedora and glass of almond milk? Ones a glass of almond milk.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

black people

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two Jews, three Nazis, and a black guy go into a bar. Where they have a spirited debate about Canadian football. And leave without coming to any conclusions.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

You know what makes no cents? 100 cents because 100 cents make a dollar.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Billy and Suzy sitting in a tree... Billy is gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than the Holocost? Two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Keanu Reaves

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

please dis this joke, I want to get to the bottom of the leaderboard!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

yo moma is so poor she cant afford free samples

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There once was a man who had a penis that was so big, his girlfriend liked it a lot. A year later they got married and had kids, but then the man lost his accounting job and things went downhill.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

*ahem* what? what. oh I thought you said something

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats green at the bottom of a hole and covered in cookie crumbs a girl scout run over by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happens when a black guy roles over a speed-bump? I don't know. I have never tried it

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops