two tomatos walked over the road and..... just kidding tomatos can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a young man holding a banana? Well, this joke had quite a good ending, but as this site only has anti jokes I am going to change the ending. Because he wanted to eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting shot in the knee several times and bleeding to a slow and painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the fat man fall off the balcony? He didn't, I pushed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the ocean say to the other ocean? - nothing oceans are inanimate objects that are incapable of talking.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What happened to the baby bird? It fell out the nest

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's white, black and can't fit through a man hole? A nun with a spear in their head

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's worse than seeing 5 dead babies on the side of the road? Realizing slavery is banned after buying a perfectly good young black male for a reasonable price at your local walmart.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Hey, austin, what are you doing?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies? You can't unload a truckload of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How can you tell if a joke is skept? Tell it to raysean and see if he laughs

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do you get when you cross a bungie cord and an owl? My ass :)

thumb_up thumb_down -29

They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A Mormon bishop, a Jewish Rabbi, and a Moslem Imam all died on the same day. They went to hell because they thought their good works would save them.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

"We wear pink on Wednesdays"" -Mean Girls, 2004

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the starving kid say to the starving parent? Pineapple

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Sometimes when I'm horny, I put vinegar on my diick

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What happend to the boy with no family? he died in a tragic car accident along with his family

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Half koala, half walrus, behold...the Koalrus!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

If I have a penny, and I give it to Michael Jackson, What will he do with it? Nothing. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops