A horse walked into a bar, the bartender asked "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, as it was a horse and did not speak English nor understand what the man had said, the horse then stumbled around the bar for a while, confused, before finding the exit and leaving.

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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i may not know where you sleep. but, i spiked your drink with sleeping pills

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Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

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With the exception of pigs, both pigs and blue jays can fly

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why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

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I'd like to make this joke funnier but I can't. It's stupid. I don't even like it.

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Yo mamma's so fat, that she weighs alot.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her repeatedly in the chest with a ball point pen

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Whats the best way to get to a girls heart? A knife.

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Why didn't Rebecca Black take the bus? Because she would have had a heart attack with all of the seat choices.

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What did the Jews say before they got of the bus? Let's make like a Jewish kid's forskin and get the hell out of here.

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What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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Knock knock who's there I killed your family

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What is worse than the holocaust? World War III.

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roses are red voilets are blue my dog stinks and so do you!

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

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Q: Why didn't the little boy get his bike for christmas? A: He died from cancer

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Bitch please, you're adopted as well.

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how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

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What did johnny say when he fell down the stairs? Nothing he snapped his neck

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a cat a dog and a penis meet up. The cat said ur lucky, when you have to pee u can go wherever you want. the dog said your lucky you can go in a litter box. the penis said your lucky u dont have to put a ballon over your head and do pushups till you throw up!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops