How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Shoot it with a high powered gun right between the eyes.

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What did one jew say to the other jew? Want some pizza?

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Have you ever seen Ethiopian food? No, neither have Ethiopians.

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How did a baby get across the street? Stapled to a chicken.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Docter Docter who? Yes its me, Craig Who your docter, I have the test results back Im afriad its positive,you've only got a few months left

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven, they get burned because the oven was left on for to long and they end up being thrown away.

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Why can't black people swim? Cause poop don't float!

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What did the Russian scientist say to the British scientist when he saw two black guys enter a strip club? "Two black guys entered the strip club"

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Never mind, that was a stupid question.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

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Do you speak alien? Hola.

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What do you get if you mix razor blades with babies? An erection.

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Pigs have the emotional capacity of a five year old think about that next time you have to dissect one in biology

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Why are anti jokes not funny.... Because they make sense.

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How many jews can fit into a car? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ash tray

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What did the mom say to her clinically depressed son? You're dad died

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Q. What did Nelson say to his men before they boarded ship? A. "Board ship men"

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What happpens when a Jew walks into a wall with a boner? He breaks his nose

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You're so fat, that a picture of you fell off the wall.

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Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, No Professionals."

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why did the husband always work late nights? he needed the extra hours to provide for his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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