Why did the tortoise cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red violets are blue this is an anti joke so like this

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why wasn't the drunk driver arrested when he killed a man? Because he died as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

have you seen Britney Spears lately? no. i wouldn't expect you to since she is a pop sensation and you are just a regular person trying to find your way in this world

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I'm a necrophiliac. Keep watch over your dead friends... ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the white teen say to the black man? Sup nigga. What then followed? A savage beating at which the teen did not survive.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a lawyer without a brain? -Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +3

whats long, hard, and full of semen? A submarine

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Excuse me, do you happen to have the time? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's a Guy Gotta Do? -Usher

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Three men went into a bar; one was blind, another deaf and the third was mute. The blind guy said "Did you SEE that?" The deaf guy said "WHAT?" And the mute said "...."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A slutty deer walks into a bar she then comes out and says wow i cant believe i blew 30 bucks

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many Poles does it take to change a lightbulb? Just the one, usually.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: what is green and looks like grass. A: fake grass

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you make a plumber sad? You murder his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

a mexican guy and a black guy are in a car, who is driving? the mexican, the black guy is in the passenger seat

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red. Violets are blue. You're a virgin.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why can't black people swim? Cause poop don't float!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two muffins are sitting in an oven, they get burned because the oven was left on for to long and they end up being thrown away.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops