What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

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Q. What do you call a bunch of guys in a shower? A. The Holocaust.

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

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Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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What do you do when a bear chases you? Run.

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Sometimes, people ask me, "Do you always have to be so obnoxious?" And to that I reply, "I don't always, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis." Stay thirsty, my friends.

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The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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PATHETIC

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What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

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What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

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a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

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When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops