What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

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why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

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Dont look at me.

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Simon says; "You're adopted."

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Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

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whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

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Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

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After Fighting Apollo creed. Rocky screams ADRIAN!!!! After 3 days of cardiac arrest he realises that ardian is a fregment on his imagination

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

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PATHETIC

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have adhd, OH A CHEESEPUFF

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What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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