Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

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Men's Rights

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Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

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Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing. Hitler died many years ago now and he was in no position of power during Bin Laden's reign of terror due to the fact that he was already dead. Therefore it is impossible that they could have had any sort of conversation. But now Bin Laden is dead as well. HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!

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What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

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What's wrong the a man who can't tell where he is, can't tell where he's going, and doesn't know how to use a map? Downs Syndrome

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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my president is black, my lambo's blue, $14,400,000,000,000 national debt

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The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he was too much of a bitch to when his friends dared him.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

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whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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