Why was Jimmy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

what do you get when you mix a shit zoo and a pitbull......"bull shit" oh this joke sucks well my life is over

why did the chicken cross the road?... it actually didn't

What do a Penguin, and your best friend have in common? They'll both die if you shoot them in the head.

What do you do when your speeding and a cop is right behind you? make a complete stop and hope for the best

What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

My penis is big... not.

NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

a gay guy walks into a bar what does he do? buys a drink after a hard day at work

How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

Your mom.

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why doed Dorris suffer from incontinence? A weiner dog punctured her bladder.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

What do you call a blank white sheet of paper? Printer paper most likely

What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

One night I went to this pub, they had a big jar full of $10 notes in top of the bar. I asked the bar tender what was that jar for and he told me that they have a donkey around back and if you make it laugh you win the jar. So i went around the back and i come back around 5 mins later and the donkey was laughing its head off. So i grabbed the jar and told the boys lets hit the clubs.Two weeks later i went to the same pub and they had another jar with $10 notesso i asked the bar tender what that jar was for and he goes to me "that donkey has been laughing ever since you left, now we want the donkey to cry" So I asked for a go and went around the back and when i come back the donkey was crying. as i went to go grab my jar but the bar tender stops and asks me how i did it. the first time i came i told the donkey i had a bigger dick then him.. the 2nd time i showed him.

How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

25 kids go into the water. shark in the water. 10 come out. Ice cream man deals with the rest of 'em.

There's a skunk and a lawyer standing on the side of the road, what's the difference? There are tire marks infront of the skunk.

what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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