Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

What's wonderful about babies? They will die sooner or later....All Of Them

a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

what would be worse then 9/11 and the holocaust? -if the twin towers fell on a concentration camp

Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

did it hurt when you fell from heaven? cause it looked like you landed on your face

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

What happened after a Mexican drank 4 shots? He got drunk and died in a car accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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