If Chuck Norris had five dollars and YOU had five dollars, he could still punch you in the face for free and get ten dollars out of it.

What's worse than loading babies into a garbage truck. Answore: unloading them with a pitch fork.

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

What did Helen Keller say to Michael Jordon before she died? Nothing...

hahahahaha thats not funny

What's the difference between a jew, a muslim and a christian. They follow different belief systems

heads up!

What do Michael Jackson and Donkey Kong have in common? They're both famous.

josh roberts got the d in geog

If she is old enough to bleed, she probably uses tampons.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Why was the Jewish man sad? His wife was brutally murdered, His chilren raped, Parents stabbed horrifically and stuffed with turtles and the doctor just informed him that he had cancer and was due to die 17 minutes ago.

Roses are red Violets are blue i cant ryme or spell.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an ax.

what did the doctor say to the guy with a bullet in his arm you have a bullet in your arm

how did I get in your moms pants. I ripped them off.

What's up brah brah

Why was the blonde girl stupid? She had suffered sever brain damage the previous month and was still recovering.

What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

What is pink and smells like red paint? Pink paint

Why was six afraid of seven? because seven had diarrhea

Q: Why did the Japanese man fall off the cliff? A: He was pushed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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