Knock Knock Who's There Your doctor... You have Aids

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why was ej's penis hard? because he had just got done having fine exquisit sex which he had ejaculated with a sturn body builder name frank who he had been seeing for the past few months.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the ocean say to the other ocean? - nothing oceans are inanimate objects that are incapable of talking.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the fat man fall off the balcony? He didn't, I pushed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Knock knock. *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call a young man holding a banana? Well, this joke had quite a good ending, but as this site only has anti jokes I am going to change the ending. Because he wanted to eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call a bad anti joke? And anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q: what are very funny A: Jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Knock knock Who's there The police "people began to jump out the back window"

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Dan was friends with Dick. Dick likes to give massages to Dan. Dan's favorite is Dickie's special mixture. He will remember Dick, his favorite personal assisatant for life. CREEPER

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was six afraid of seven? Because your a fag.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q. How many puns does it take to make a cup of tea? A. None. A pun is a grammatical construct and as such is incapable of combining the ingredients necessary to generate a hot drink which has been popular for hundreds of years.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was the man sad? His intestines were imploding and his head was shot off seventeen seconds ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

GINGER PEOPLE

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Paper shield.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What would George washington do if he was still alive He isn't so we dont have to worry about that.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man walks into a bar. Wait, no, it was a horse. A man walks into a horse

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q-What do you call a woman in the kitchen? A- A woman making me a damn sammich thats what.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man said to the bartender "I'll have a H2O, please." His friend said "Yeah, I'll have a H2O too." The bartended wasn't an idiot and was aware that he was in a bar, not a science lab, and handed them both a bottle of H2O. His friend still died.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

How do you get 4 Jews in a car? Open the door and tell them politely to get in.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q) How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A) It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Roses are blue Violets are red I'm colorblind

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops