why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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I'm a fork. Fork you!!

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What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

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What's better than winning the lottery? Winnig the lottery twice.

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if i get 1,000 likes ill kill your hole family

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I've got ninety-nine problems, all of them very diverse and possibly involving women.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ted. Come in.

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balls

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Violets are blue, Roses are red, I like to mix up my poems.

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Knock knock "Who's there?" Blood on the Dance Floor "Ha!"

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Knock Knock? Who's there? bob bob who? the builder

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Last night I had the strangest dream. I was eating a big marshmallow and when I woke up this morning I had appendicitus

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Why did the litle boy's hat come off? cause he got hit by a train!

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A blonde walks into a bar... ...she got rufeed.

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What do you call a pencil that's been broken in half? 2 pencils

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whats the difference between a mexican and a fish? one is a human being while the other is a fish, what did you expect?

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What is the difference between a plum and an elephant? One is purple, and not an elephant.

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What do Tiger Woods and Charlie Sheen have in common? They are both celebrities.

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Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

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DARK FACT: A ratchet black chick would say that was racist.

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Violets are blue, Roses are red. The sentence before was completely irrelevant, but I needed something to say before I tell you, Your family's been murdered by the KKK.

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Q:What's red and hurts your teeth? A:A brick

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what did one swedish guy say to another swedish guy? I dont speak russian

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If a little boy teleported to mars how fast would he get there? Little boys are incapable of breaking down their molecular structure in order to send their individual particles faster than the speed of light in any given direction. Thus this question is illogical and can not be answered.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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