If John has no nose, what do John's friends call him? John

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How could you wake up Lady Gaga? poke her face

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

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How can you tell if a woman is a man? If she has a penis

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Snooki

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Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench A: The NBA

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ok, a family walks into a talant agency, the talent agent says "What can you do". The family breaks out into a sing and dance routine, and do nothing sexual in their routine.

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( . Y . )

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What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

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Roses are red Violets are blue My friend has diabetes Stop posting diabetic jokes

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Wigan.

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I have a black guy on my family tree. He's my cousin.

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What's great about taking a shower with a twelve year old girl. Pulling her hair back and making her look like a six year old

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is dead, and thereby lacks the necessary motor control.

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Guess what. I eat weed and smoke yogurt

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UNICORNZ R PURPUL

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What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

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Where do baby apes sleep? In apricots

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Why did the meme cross the road? MEME XD

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women's rights

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Zombies eat brains! (You're safe)

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Why is the sky blue? As the light from our Sun shines into the atmosphere, most of the colors are able to reach the Earth’s surface uninterrupted. However, because blue light has a wavelength that is the same size as the particulates in the air, this light is scattered in every direction. This blue light bounces from particulate to particulate until it eventually reaches your eyes. For this reason, no matter what direction you look in the sky, it appears to be blue. This blue light originated with the Sun, was bounced around in the sky many times, and then eventually reached your eyes.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she get up? She had no legs. *Knock knock* Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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