What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being dragged to his death by an 18 wheeler.

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Cut off your fingers and lose weight fast!!!

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What do you call a black guy running from the cops? Nothing. He was out for his morning jog and he happened to run by the police.

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The Rock: What is your name? Jeff: My name is... The Rock: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!

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What is the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do.

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Train A leaves the station at 1:42 while traveling in 176kmh. How long will it take for the conductor to realize the bridge it ou... Too long.

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What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

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why did the cow die because she ate poisoned apple pie

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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Why should you paint a canoe black? Being the darkest color, it will hide dirt, scratches, and normal wear and tear on your canoe better than lighter colors.

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Why did the kid fall over? He was hit by a car

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Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins

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What's the difference between Jew and a bread? Bread does not scream when you put him in oven.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was playing Pokemon Go.

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Why aren't 4 black people driving a red mustang? They can't afford it.

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"Knock Knock" "whos there" "interupting cow" "interupting cow who" "i have aids"

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what was the last pizza place the twin towers ordered from? Domino's

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Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

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whats a willy? -brock

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Bob: Whats the difference between a fish and a microwave? Steve: I don't know Bob: Daaaamn your dumb!

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you wanna hear a funny joke? so do I

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Bob dole

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops