Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

?"what's up" "A preposition"

When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy mad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy in pain? A: Because a clown was ripping off the boys big toes with a hacksaw, all the while causing the small boy emotional pains by killing the boy's orange cat.

Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

whats worse than 9/11 a paper cut

Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

A man called his dentist and asked when he should make an appointment. The dentist told him to come in around two thirty pm because that's when the next appointment was available.

What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

What is Justin Beiber's favorite pastime? According to his biography, it's reading science fiction novels

What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot.

3 jews walk into a bar I lied it was a gas chamber

Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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