A farmer had a horse that he rode frequently. He would talk to the horse and tell it it was his closest companion. One day the farmer noticed that the horse was walking funny. So he shot it.

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Womens Rights

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Two guys walk into a bar.

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What's white and cant jump? A Fridge

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Roses are flowers Violets are flowers

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How many jews can fit into a car? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ash tray

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Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

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There are two muffins in an oven. The first muffin says, "Is it just me, or is it getting hot in here?". The second one says, "Hey, look! A talkin' muffin!".

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What did the Egyptian helicopter do when it went into the pyramid? Exploded.

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roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

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What do you call a blonde who likes to read? A bookworm.

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What do you call a joke without a punchline?

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Roses are red Violets are orange Thats odd, my violets are somehow orange

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A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

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Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

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A man walked into a metal bar, they were playing Metallica.

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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A blonde walks into a bar. She just graduated university and thought she would celebrate with a beer.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue...........Im wearing socks

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A: what does hellen keller say to her mom? B: nothing. she cant speak due to her lack of hearing and visualizing

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I always wanted to know what the future will hold in the decades to come... Until I realized the idiotness of my own thought for it is nigh impossible for us humans to see the future... Except... That the ancient Mayan civilization prophesized the end of the universe, which I did take into consideration as I slowly nibbled my way through the waffle cone till I had realized that I had reached the paper surrounding the cone and immediately spat it out for it leaves a fowl taste In my mouth, then continued eating my ice cream as I pondered the future and the anti-climatic ending of this anti-joke.

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What's long and hard? The Ap European exam that i just took.

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What's the difference between a fine wine and a dead baby in a blender? One gets better as it ages, and the other is a horrific accident.

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How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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