Whats the similarity between your mom and me We are both men except for your mom

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? HIV

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Justin Bieber.

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how did i know i had a new puppy?...... i found out when i was scraping it off my truck tire

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whats black white and read all over a zebra bleeding to death because a zombie just attacked it and then it attackeed the zombie

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And love is, bein' the owner of a company that makes rape whistles and even though you started the company with good intentions trying to reduce the rate of rape, now you don't wanna reduce it at all cuz if the rape rate declines you'll see an equal decline in whistle sales. Without rapists, who's gonna buy your whistles? Who's gonna buy your whistles? Love is all about whistles.

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

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Q.What do you call a beaver with a unibrow. A. A beaver........it's still a beaver

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What's black and can't climb trees? A parking lot

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

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A man goes to the doctor and is told, "you have cancer." He then spends his last days writing a bucket list, but losing his leg in a wood chipper before he could complete a single item on his list

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What do retards say when someone knocks on the door... NOBY HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....................and that concludes our moment of silence

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What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

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What does a bird and a human have in common? They both use long, hard sticks.

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Did y'all see Lafell catch that pass? Neither did I

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Why didn't the parakeet eat my diarrhea? I already ate it.

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What do you call a man with a shovel through his head? Unless he was carrying ID when he died; John Doe.

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A drunkard stumbles into the bar. Now he's got thousand's of dollars in medical bills.

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What's a pirate's favorite school subject? Pirate math.

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Wanna hear a joke? Denver Broncos.

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Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

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knock knock get lost!

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Your mother is so fat when she jumps she comes backs down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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