Guess what! what haha u listened to me

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Hear the one about the deaf guy? Neither has he.

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What does Patrick say? IM PATRICK!!! IM PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK!!!!! PATRICK!!!!!

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a black kid goes and gets some cereal and spills some flower on him self and he goes to his grandma and says look grandma i`m white and then she slaps him he goes to his grandpa and says look grandpa i`m white and then he slaps him and then he goes to his mom and then says look mom i`m white and then she slaps him then he goes to his dad and then says dad i`ve been white for 20 minutes and i all ready hate yall nigas

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rishi is gay (coventry england)

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Axel? Its Eliza, is that you? You alive again? I don't want to be no successor of anything, but thanks I guess. Neo-Nero has not shown up since you returned, I think he isn't very proud of himself and wont be a problem here on forward. He did push me aside, but now that you are alive, I wont even consider the thought of you "dying again" and unless you are dying or seriously ill, I don't want to hear anything about it. Seriously, how bad are you doing? Physically I mean? I am relieved, I mean we all thought you where dead.

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Not everyone with a mustache is a child molester, but not every child molester has a mustache.

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Someone threw a cigarette at me today... What a fag.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Q. What did the man say when he beat his video game? A. "I beat my video game." Q. What did the man say after his favorite sports team missed the playoffs? A. "My favorite sports team missed the playoffs." Q. What did the man say when a murderer was in his house? A. Nothing. He was dead.

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Three men are all in a car park and they all want the same parking spot. As it turns out, it was a trolley bay

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A homosexual black man and a 13 year old child are in the shower at the local gym. The black man says to the boy "you dropped your soap, why don't you pick it up?" The boy promptly thanks the black man, picks up his soap and continues to shower.

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Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

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I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

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What did Hellen Keller name her dog? Her parents named it Spot; Hellen Keller isn't able to speak due to her handicapped muteness.

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acualy is dolan

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What's the difference between a jew and a jew? They both died in the gas chamber.

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When the tsunami hit in 2004, christians worldwide prayed for the victims. it didnt help

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Why did the chicken cross the road? chickens are very unintelligent, and often walk around aimlessly with no purpose.

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What do you call a donkey that can't speak? Whatever you want to call it...I prefer to call it a donkey that can't speak!

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What did the pear say to the orange? Orange ya gonna say hi? What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk.

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Women.

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Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for pooh

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A priest, a rabbi and an imam walk into a bar. They proceed to have an in-depth conversation about interfaith dialogue and no one questions the imam orders of non-alcoholic beverages.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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