knock knock who's there Scott, Scott who, Scott Rollheiser stole my joke and posted it here.

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Q. Whats Brow and rhymes with Snoop? A Dr. Dre

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Girl : What's a anti joke ? Boy : it's you .

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What's black and bleeding? Who cares?

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What did the feminist say to the CIS white male? I respect you as a person.

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Why did the little boy have a gun pointed at his head? Because he hated his life and wanted to kill himself.

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Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

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Why can't Hellen Keller play hide and go seek? Because she is dead.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

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Why do women have boobs? So they can feed their newborn children without paying for expensive formula

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What do you call ugly? Dionne Dodds

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What's worse than dropping you ice-cream cone? Signing your post on Anti-joke.com

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A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

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What did the psycho killer order for dessert? Ice Cream.

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Whats worse than purple nurples? Having the period

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0 + 0 = 0

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Pineapples have a smaller volume than the sun

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why did the polar bear bury his face into snow? because he saw the 241543903 post and wanted to join in so he used a portal gun to teleport his head into some guy's freezer.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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varför skriver jag på svenska jag vet inte

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Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

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What's spotted and has dildos strapped to their neck? Jews

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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