roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

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What is green, slimy and has 8 legs? Uncle Martin

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Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said, who's there? KNOCK KNOCK OH MY GOD, WHO IS IT??? Yes, we have your daughter here, she was caught doing drugs on school property.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why were trash man's hands dirty? He got shot in the leg and desperately tried to get the bullet out with his hands and got blood all over them and ass he was running to the hospital he tripped into shit.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If i gave a rats ass I'd worry about you

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I want to tie a baby to the back of a truck then reverse into a wall.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Marmite.

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Roses are black Violets are white I'm colorblind

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a. how did you shoot the rabbit? b. with my banana

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What advice did the cat give to the man? Nothing because it's a cat.

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What do you say when the cheese isn't yours? The cheese does not belong to me.

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Donald Trump

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Priority parking for hybrid cars

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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Knock Knock. I paid good money for a doorbell. Use it, please.

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Whats worse than finding a spider in your shower? Getting repeatedly stabbed in the dick by a rapid chipmunk.

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Two black men go inside a movie theater. They sit down and watch the movie.

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Back when I was your age, we had to entertain ourselves with video games and TV.

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue. Wouldn't want to be caught in the crossfire.

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A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman walk into a bar and the barman asks "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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good one jess !!

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A cannibal went for a walk and he passed his brother.

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A man finds a mysterious lamp on the side of the road. He picks it up, rubs it, and sells the lamp at a pawn shop for $10,000. The man paid off his credit card debt and was happy that he did not have to file for bankruptcy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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