Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

Why did the moron jump through the window?

My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

Q: What did William Wallace say to Beyonce after Taylor Swift's performance? A: Nothing, because William Wallace has been dead for some time now.

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

Why I the kid still at school? His mom was brutally run over by a car

How many Mexicans can you fit into a car? The bathroom is on the left, mam.

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

Why wasn't the bat nocturnal? It was dead.

Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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