Knock knock! Who's there? The police, your entire family has died in a terrible car accident.

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

If you like this song so much why don't you marry it? Because a divorce would be tough on the kids

What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold clima I guess this was just a waste of time.

Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

Knock Knock Whos there? It's me Ben. You just told me to come over. We are going jogging aren' we? Oh ya, sorry. I forgot the time. Is it cold out? Ya, it is pretty cold. You should bring a jacket. Ok, let me go get my jacket. Alright, can u grab me a water please? Ya sure. Thankyou.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

Once upon a time there was a nice old man who loved to ride his bike... He unfortunately died when he had a heart attack.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its feet are both the same.

who ever is reading this....

Do you want to hear a joke? No. Women's- oh, okay.

Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

What did the squirrel say to the other squirrel? Squirrels can't talk.

what do you call a 19th century steam train driver ? i dont know , depends what his mother named him

What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

How did the blonde get Lost in her house? Netflix.

10 people walk into a bar. 6 hours later, 3 more people walk into the bar. There are now 12 people in the bar, and one corpse in the dumpster out back.

Roses are red Here's something new Violets are violet NOT F**KING BLUE

A Mexican, an Italian and an American all walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have pleasant conversation, and all return home to loving families safely and securely.

Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

What's worse than getting Ebola? Nothing

25

How did Darth Vader make the little black boy's day? "I am your father"*heavy breath, heavy breath*

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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