Why did the chicken cross the road? It had places to be

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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What do you call a person with no legs playing soccer? A soccer player.

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Q: why was the girl so dumb A: her teacher was a blond

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These Jokes suck.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

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What did the zebra say to the giraffe? Nothing, they can't talk dipshit.

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I look back at all those hours I wasted playing those stupid video games, but then I'm reminded of all those people I brutally killed.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? It's illegal to eat the Jew.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a terrorist.

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I was reading this book one time..... and my imagination took me away to many lands and times.

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What has the head of a lion, the body of a mule, and the penis of a seal? Nothing... what the hell did you think it was? Are you on drugs or something?

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8================================================================================================D-------------------------------------------- It can coil!

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what did the dog say? dogs can't talk therefore he said nothing

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Q: why was the women out of the kitchen? A: Probably to partake in one of her many hobbies.

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why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

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Student: May i go to the toilet? Teacher: What for? Student: To open the chamber of secrets!

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Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch? Because someone put him there.

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What does a Jewish Santa Clause say? This scenario is highly improbable as Jews celebrate Hanukkah and not Christmas.

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a boy walks over to the living room and shouts " happy birthday, daddy!!" the response is "i'm a cup, therefore i do not have a birthday because i am an inanimate object."

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

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Q: what did a kid in harlem get for christmas? A: nothing he got shot

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What is the most dangerous day of the week to leave the house? Garbage day. Moral: Or rather GAAAAAAAAAARBAAAAAGE DAAAAAAAAAAAAY! *BANG BANG BANG* >:D

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops