The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

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What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

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There's two people, one wearing a nice sweater and the other is not. The one without has to walk the dog, so he asks the other guy if he can have his sweater. He says "No but you can wear it."

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Honestly though bud, are you wasted? XD

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I'm trying to see from Adam Fantuzzi's point of view but i cant stick my head that far up my arse Daniel

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What do you call a man with 3 arms, 6 ears, 9 fingers, and a red clown nose? His name.

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If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

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Your time.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

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Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

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Whats Black and White and Red all over ? A Zebra laying in a pool of its own blood.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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A boy wakes up in the morning and says i"'m feeling kind of fishy today," the boy's dad walks in and relpies "that's because you are a fish."

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Q: what did the nazi say to the other nazi A: hallo

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

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how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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How do you get a one armed man out of a tree? you throw a fridge at him

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How do you unclog a toilet? You call a plumber.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all walk into a bar. Because, often, friends go out together in social situations.

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"33"

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What's the difference between a blonde and a blow up doll? The blonde is a person, you sexist asshole.

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So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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