What did the Dinosaur say to the other dinosaur when he saw a huge meteor? Oh hey look a meteor.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread, and loaves of bread are incapable of understanding the intricacies of fly-by-wire guidance and propulsion systems.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is yellow and corny? Corn.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I got shot once it hurt a lot

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the boy go to the hospital? He didn't. Unfortunately the gunshot wound severely injured the boy and he was unable to be revived in time to survive.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

a bumble bee walked into a bar, looking tired and worn out. 'long day, eh?' said the barman. 'yes' replied the bee. 'i was flying along to collect some honey when i noticed a large obstical obstructing me. i stuck my pointy needle in it, and according to legend, i will die in short hours to come' suddenly michael jacksons thriller flicked on in the jukebox, the bumble bee boogied all night long until he slowly passes away in the early hours of the morning. long live boogie bee.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A black man, a Mexican man and a white man walk into a bank. The black man reaches into his bag and pulls out his bank card, the Mexican and the the white man do the same as they need to withdraw money.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why are there no swimming pools in Mexico? The average yearly income is $3,523, and pool chemicals are very expensive.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

your mom is so annoying that she has no freinds and lives alone crying every night about how her children abandoned her

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Did you hear about the guy who came onto his best friend's wife? Yeah, she handed him some kleenex after and told him to wipe it off.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? A: A dog

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Enough with the "whats worse than ... "jokes! They are getting old and have a millon different possible answers. I am aware that this is not a joke but thumbs up if you aggree with.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats black and white and red all over? a zebra crossing after a horrible, horrible car accident

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Yo mama so fat, when she went to a party, they took the apple from the roast pig's mouth, and they put it on her mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the lady find when she walked through the door? Her husband stabbing himself to death because she ate his cornflakes

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

SCP-009-J is missing. Where has it gone? Is it under the table? Was it sat upon? Is it there on the ceiling? Is it under the rug? Was it gobbled right up by a quantum pillbug? Did it run through the tunnel? Did it fall down the stair? Was it sent back in time to a carnival fair? Did it get on a train to a far-away place? Is it locked in a falsified beacon from space? Did it fall in the oobleck and [DATA EXPUNGED]? If it clogged up the sink, will it have to be plunged? Just where has SCP-009-J gotten to? Oh wait, that's right! SCP-009-J is you!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

No.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's funny about the old man who got stabbed? Nothing... you're a sick person!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Don't you sometime just want to chop of your toes and stomp around to prove to the so called 'experts' that it is possible for a person to walk without toes? . . . . . . me neither

thumb_up thumb_down -10

try slamming a revolving door

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do you call a grown man who sticks food up his nose? retarded

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops