What do you call a puppy in alaska? A cold PUPPY!!!!!

I have a black man in my family tree... He's still hanging there.

Q: Who's afraid of the big bad wolf? A: A couple of pigs with questionable carpenter's skills, and maybe Red Riding Hood. Grandma wasn't so lucky.

- Knock knock. - Who's there? - I am. - I am who? - You are Steve. - Indeed.

What has four legs, and smells when it's wet? A wet dog.

why doesn't mexico have an olypics because theyre already running,swimming and jumping over the border

what did the green grape say to the purple grape? i'm green.

What do you call a fat indian boy Eeeeeeeh fatty boy

like a someboyyyyyyyyyyyy

Who's black, white and Asian at the same time? A panda.

What's worse than getting an F on your paper? Walking in on a man wearing your mother's skin after vigorously raping her in front of your baby sister.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1Kuo-n7Du0

Why is black people's skin darker? Africa

What's long, hard, and full of seamen? An ejaculating penis.

What looks like a duck, smells like a duck and feels like a duck? A duck.

In the middle of a long flight from Heathrow to Chicago O'Hare, the passengers of a 747 watched the engines all suddenly flame out. "Now, folks," the captain said over the PA as the plane plummeted to the earth, "I want it on record that I said it in plain English: a 747 can't fly from Heathrow to Chicago without refueling." No one bothered writing it down.

Went to a zoo there was a asian shouting GOOZILLA at the reptile house I said no 2 frickly pickles please He said helwo I'm wo pong th pow wice to weet you I said does he come with subtitles Old priest said no the said hello little boy want a mint I said oh thanks I'm not a boy I'm 19 Old priest said no no you can't have one of my special mints I said wait those mints have R's on them are the rainbow mints Old priest no there raspberry I said ok don't be a stranger Old priest said oh I will I said wait your THE PRIEST He said oh I'm just a priest looking for little boys I said no your dead now jumped 30 feet in the air sat on a bird dove into him bird went threw him we made a team promised to clean the world of evil only to find out that we killed the mother of all priest Bird said tweak tweak I said yeah let's hunt them all down Shall the be a part 2 you decide

A Mime travels to Africa for a vacation. He meets a Zebra in his travels and the Zebra says "Hey we both are wearing black and white stripes!" The Mime did not understand the Zebra because he cannot talk his language so he continues on with his vacation.

Why did little Johnny fall off his swing? He had no arms.

Why did the black guy jump over the fence ? The holocost.

how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

sometimes i wonder why is the frisbee getting bigger? then it hits me

Two Jews walk into a bar. They have a lengthy discussion regarding the hardships their people have suffered throughout history. Eventually, the subject changes to which coffee franchise has the best blend. A clear, concise decision is never reached. They then are asked to leave the bar, as they have not ordered any drinks and the bar is for paying customers only.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there? Alzheimers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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