What do you call a flying jew? Smoke.

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I really might try and kill myself when I get home tonight.

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What did the engineer say to the supervisor? Hi.

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i homeless man asked for ome change. he didnt get any because people were afraid he would spend it on drugs

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Blake wilkeys hair style

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What is brown and has 15 legs? (They answer "What?") Reply: I don't know I was hoping you would.

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what has small feet? a human being with a tiny proximity of feet matter.

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How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

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What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

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please dis this joke, I want to get to the bottom of the leaderboard!

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What's worse than a kid being bullied at school? A kid being bullied at school, to go home and be raped by his stepdad.

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How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Woof woof

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HI MY NAME IS DOUG

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How does a pirate get to work? His CAAAARRRR! Where does the pirate go after work? The BAAAARRRR! How does the pirate get home from the bar? A taxi. A pirate doesn't drive after consuming alcohol.

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Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

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Why did the black man say "I been done did that?" He was speaking ebonics.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried to to commit suicide.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple whilst you're in a bar after finding out you have cancer when you visited your families grave? Having a refrigerator thrown at you by an aids infected monkey with no arms or legs.

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How much cocaine has Charlie Sheen done? enough to put your health at risk

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A fast car that's painted red and green...

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Two tomatoes walk across the street and manage to get over safely. COME ON MUSTARD!

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What's red and screams? A peeled baby in a bag of salt.

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Why did the boy scratch his back? A:because it was itchy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops