Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

A girl asked for lip balm. She put some on and her lips exploded.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not doing your Webtime on a Friday!!

Knock knock Who's there? Boo Boo who? It's just a joke you don't have to cry about it

a. why? b. because I wanted

What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

How many Muslims does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

A tightly dressed woman walks up to a man and asks if he wants a good time they go out for dinner and have a lot in common and agree to meet again in the near future

Why can't Hellen Keller play hide and go seek? Because she is dead.

why did the puppy poop? he had too

What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? Nothing. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said objects are, are in no way capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

Why was Steve hungry? Because the last time he ate was yesterday.

Roses are black Violets are black Im Helen Keller WWWHHAATTTTT!?!?

A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

What do you call a dolphin that drives a Mercedes Benz? Nothing. Dolphins can't drive.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What do birds need when they are sick? Most wild animals die when they are sick. However, they can sometimes be nursed back to health with special food and electrolyte solutions in special animal rehabilitation centres.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a cage being carried by a farmer.

Why did the fish cross the road? Because fish don't have legs and can't walk anywhere

0 + 0 = 0

knock knock who's there your family just died your family just died who? -.-

how do you get a cat out of a tree? with boomerangs

why dont we just take bikini bottom and push it somewhere else

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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