You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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Why did the woman have no boobs? Breast cancer

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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Why do you never want to party with Lindsay Lohan? Because she's a drug abuser and a terrible influence.

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A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

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Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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Cripples are lame.

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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