Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

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What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

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Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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Have you heard of the Armenian genocide? No? Me neither.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

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a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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Andoni was here

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What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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