Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

Denard Robinson

What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...