How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

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What type of party do you throw when your fat? A baby shower.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Urine is yellowish and shit is usually brown... That's it, I was just remembering the colors of some stuffs

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Did you hear what happened to the blonde ice hockey team? They drowned in spring training.

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

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Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

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Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs?

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

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how did the black guy get into school? he walked thru the front door.

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

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What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

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Hollywood today: If you Like Dragonball Evolution you are gonna love this. Peter Linkoff a 16 year old boy, is being chased by his half brother Jack Ganonbad as Peter Falls into a hole, which contains a cellphone... ...THE LINK TO PLANET ZELDA! There he discovers that he holds the Link between earth and Zelda, and just then planet Zelda is threatened by The Evil Master Sword! A Meteor so destructive, that it sheer force could destroy the entire universe! *Random scenes going by so fast that you cant make shit out of them begins* "PETER LINKOFF YOU ARE IN DANGER!" *BOOOOOOM*" "BUT WHAT IF HE IS NOT THE DELIVER OF THE BOOMERANG!" Iiiit is said... Thhaat heee that wields the lasergun known as the wooden sword...<

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wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops