A dog walks into a bar Because the door was open -Tag

Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

did you hear about the dyslexic, overweight, wheelchair bound blind guy? No? Niether did I, I'm deaf so don't hear about anything.

Some say Helen Keller can't write a good book. You know what she said? Nothing.

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

A father and his son get into an accident and are whisked away to the hospital. The father dies, and the son is brought into surgery. The doctor is rushed in, but looks at the boy and says "I can operate on this boy, his my son." How is this possible? The boy's father was a zombie.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

What do u call 30000 Mexicans rolling Dow a hill. Hahaha your mom

Lol! The connection timed out. Double D`s they kill my back so I am gonna get them reduced someday, and sure because it gets really itchy otherwise.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his village has been ravaged by small pox.

What do you call a cow with no legs. Dead, the farmer cut them off.

A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

whats gay and american? a gay american

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...