Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

What do you say to a confused blond? You help her with her conundrum.

Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

What did Hitler say to the Nazis? I have a mustache.

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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