Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she was born with no arms and is not loved.

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

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what did katness save her Life? because peter hates her and katness is peaches and peter dies in the titanic because it is gay shut up becky

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Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

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rose are red so is u want to know why because i shot her

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Niall Horan

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How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

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I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

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Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

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Roses are red, Violets are Violets. Screw this poem. Potato.

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When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

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Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

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Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did Michael dye. Because he was dyslexic and a plain fell on his noggin.

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What did the girl say when she got her period? Nothing, why would she want anyone to know?

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Josh Moran peels off his foreskin while watching gay porn.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

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My favorite color is Ham. And I can count to Potato.

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A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

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Why didn't the young child commiserate the death of his grandparents after they were simultaneously crippled by a tremendous avalanche whilst skiing? He didn't exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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