id give my right arm to be ambidextrous

This is my fist. Would you politely run into it as fast as you can?

There's a elf ,a peice of paper, and a pencil. What happens next? The elf writes on the paper.

Knock Knock CUM IN!

your mom is so old, she is often confused for your grandmother.

What's worse than being arrested? Being arrested twice

A black man confronts a small white man on the sidewalk and asks for money. The white man responded "no".

If i have a remote that can switch people to mute, the number 1 people will be asian, and it will be on the train.

Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

So there was once this cool little dude that had a purple nose. People would walk by on the streets and say, "Hey! That's a cool nose!" Purple nose man appreciated that they didn't pretend it wasn't there, and instead celebrated the diversity. The next day, he was scalped.

Why did the first monkey fall off the tree? becuase he died Why did the second monkey fall off the tree? because he was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall off the tree? monkey see, monkey do

Gay republicans

q- what do you call a small number of black people running away from a large group of white people? a- every marathon known to man...

How do you torture Helen Keller? Tie her down and plant a bamboo seed under her.

What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? Jenga games regularly don't kill around 3000 people.

Q:what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat A:The wheel chair

Why did Jane break up with DeShawn? Cause they grew apart

A man walks into a bar. He has had a tough day at work and unwinds with a beer. He goes home to his loving family. He makes love to his wife that night. It's good but not great.

What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

roses are red, violets are blue, get on your knees ho, and stick to me like glue.

Where does a blind person drive a car? Into a tree.

why do you put a baby in the blender feet first to see its expression

What the problem with writing an anti-joke? Trying to not come up with a punchline.

Why did the chicken successfully cross the road? It didn't in the middle of the street it got hit by a car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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