how do you make abus driver cry? you rip his limbs off.

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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Guess what your birth certificate really is. An apology letter from the condom factory.

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What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

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knock knock who's there? rude, interrupting cow rude, interrupting cow who? just kidding, its steve. cows can't talk

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Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

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Nowadays, aviation is the most secure means of conveyance in the world, but paragliding is not.

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An American, a German, and a Mexican walk quickly into a room. They were late for a work meeting.

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A black man and a white man get married... Trick question, since gay marriage is illegal in the United States, the men did not get married, and they later both died alone.

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What do you call a blonde with great maths skills? A smart person with blonde hair.

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What's the difference between a dead dog and a dead black man on the road? One's a dog and one is a man, but more importantly the differences shouldn't be noted in a miserable occasion such as this as both are unfortunate tragedies. Also, one has a big dick.

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What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

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What's worse then falling up the stairs? Ketchup

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Not the case here, though.

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4 hours later.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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why was the black man blind? because he was black.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

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I don't know which one is emptier my bank account or my love life

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Can't Sing, Or Ryhme

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my uncle used to tickle me.. he's in prison for child abuse

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After eating dinner, my dad said... "That was really good."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops