How do you stop the baby from touching the stove? Cut of its arms.

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what did the black man say to the white girl? He respectfully asked her out on a date and theyve been happily dateing ever since.

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what did the horse say to the bartender? why the short face?

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Q: why was the girl so dumb A: her teacher was a blond

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A: u wanna die B: that is a stupid question because unless u are suicidal u will not, retorical or not A: i do wanna die B: u should get some help u freak person a never did get help, while walking to a certivied psychiatrict evaluater he got hit by a truck. his body can be found at the intersection of church and flatbush, brooklyn. JK he got shot, he was in brookly, duh.

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What did the little gril with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer

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How many batteries does it take to run a car 1 a car battery

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Why did the man go to sleep at 9:30? Because his mom told him to

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In Soviet Russia... People Die for Voicing their Opinions

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Where do you go when your friends called you spoiled? Africa.

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Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch? Because someone put him there.

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What has feet but cannot walk? What has a beak but cannot peck? What has wings but cannot fly? A dead bird.

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A blind man walks past a fish market, pauses, takes in a big sniff, and says, "Good morning ladies!" to the women walking by wearing too much perfume.

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What do you call a room with a white man a black man and a hot pocket? A reasonable meal

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A Mime travels to Africa for a vacation. He meets a Zebra in his travels and the Zebra says "Hey we both are wearing black and white stripes!" The Mime did not understand the Zebra because he cannot talk his language so he continues on with his vacation.

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What kind of fire alarm does a zebra not like? One that doesn't work

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What do you call a black Santa Claus A N i g g e r that doesn't exist

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What do you call a man who's eating thirty big macs ? Hungry.

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Two people are walking down the street, unaware of the highly polluted environment and that they could save a life.

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how do u get a blonde to stay away from her credit card... i dont know im blonde

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The POLICE, now open the god damn door!

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Q: Why doesn't the Mexican belong in St. Louis? A: Because he ran away from home, his family lives in Kansas City.

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- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

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How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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