Why did the slut have white stuff on her mouth? Because she just ate ice-cream.

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When life gives you lemons....you probably just FOUND lemons...

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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why do black people hate school? because they have to sit and learn like the rest of us for hours on end

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What do you call a blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba? A blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba!

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What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

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What makes a good jack-o-lantern? A pumpkin

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Why wasn't my T.V. on? Because I didn't have a remote.

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i heard something so funny it made me crap my pants you were a mistake

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From the makers of Call of Duty 1, comes Call of Duty 2.

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why does god like Justin Bieber? He can't god doesn't like the devil.

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9

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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What srtarts with "P" and ends in "orn"? Popcorn

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You know what they called Obama in highschool? Nigge*

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I was going to post some witty jokes, but then I realized they weren't funny.

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jelly is a clear or translucent fruit spread made from sweetened fruit juice, and set using naturally occurring pectin. Jam contains both fruit juice and pieces of fruit.

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What did the Mexican man say to the American man? Nothing. Neither of them spoke the same language.

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*knock knock* Who's there? *Gorilla* Gorilla who? *Gorillas don't hoot, owls hoot*

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Did you hear about the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13 for sexual content/nudity, language, and some violence.

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What do you get if you have 59 apples in your right hand and 74 pints of ice cream in your right? Large hands.

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What do you call a man man with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? Bob(he is bobbing in the water)

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There is a man who is half black half Jewish. He walking up a hill really fast. What happens to him? Answer: The Jewish side of his body will fall off and the black side will walk away.

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What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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