Why did the chicken cross the road? because potatos are invading russia

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Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

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Why did the boy get hit by the bus? He didn't check both sides before crossing

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Chinese drivers.

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Another cat joke. You gotta be kitten me.

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what would Michael jakson do if he was alive? scream and hit the top of his coffin

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I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

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How old are you like 10? Im 11 so shut the fuck up

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A African American male and a Mexican male are both in a car, who is driving? Most likely the owner or the car.

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Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

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OK. so a guy walks up to another guy and says hi. The other guy said nothing. The other guy said hi again. The guy said nothing The guy got really mad and slapppeed him across the face. Finally the man said PURPLE RABBID COMPUTER TREES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and walked away while liking his blue brick.

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If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is around, does anyone really care?

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

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What did the black kid get for his birthday?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 was a registered 6 offender

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What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

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A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

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Why was Sally crying? Because she had a frog stapled to her face.

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whats the only concert you can get into for 45 cents? a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback

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knock knock Labrinth come in

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Roses are red. Violets are red. My thumb is red because I accidentally put it in the toaster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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