What is worse than Justin Bieber? Well, 1. Deforestation 2. Hurricanes 3. Diabetes 4. Mass Murder ....and probably much more.

Three women are sent to heaven. Theres a blond , brunette , and a redhead. There are 100 steps to heaven and on every step god tells you a joke and you cant laugh. The redhead makes it to step 23 then laughs. The brunette makes it to step 67 then laughs. Finally the blond make it all the way to the 100th step and before god can tell the joke she laughs. God asks why are u laughing? And the blond says " i just got the 1st one"!

What do you call a really old Cowboy? A senior citizen with a brain tumor.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon

Two Jews walk into a bank. They make a deposit and leave.

Why? Whats wrong?

Grab your Taco, you've pulled a dyslexic Mexican

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because its a horse and cant speak or understand english and gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables and stools.

A group of Germans eagerly await the FIFA football rankings. England is fourth.

if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Leukemia.

What is the same between a turtle and an eagle? They both fly, apart from the turtle.

Q: Why does an elephant have flat feet? A: From jumping out of trees

Whats black and has no ring? LeBron James

How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

how do you wake up lady gaga you poke her face

Why does Sally sell sea shells down by the sea shore? To support her growing crack addiction that is ruining Sally's and Sally's families lives

how do you make a mailman mad? you sleep with his wife

How did you know it was bedtime at Michael Jackson's house? When his clock's big hand met the little hand, usually at 10 or 11, though sometimes later if he had a concert that night.

How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

A man keeping specific track of time,eagerly waits for a punch line.

what'd one jew say to the other jew? i cant eat this its ham. (sounds better when said with disappointed jew voice)

When I walk in the rain, I get wet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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