A man walks into a bar and says "ow"

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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matty russel are you on here

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I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

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What worse than the holocaust? Dries Roelvink!

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Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and suffered from a self-inflicted gunshot wound in his head, he is being treated by medical professionals

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Knock Knock Who's there? Pussy... Do you get it? Think about what you just answered.

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What's white and hides in a tree. A refrigerator.

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What is white on the inside and red on the outside? An apple.

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Whats the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? One is a specific type of sports car, and the other is a sad destruction of many young lives

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the batmobile? Robin, get in the batmobile

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What's the difference between and Jew and pizza?!?!?! Jews are people and pizza is a food product :D

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what's worse than a kitten scratching your arm? A dead baby scratching your arm...

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I see said the blind man to his def wife as the dog with no legs ran over

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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A plane is going to land at 3:30, if the monkey is holding a gun how does the bus driver commite suicide 12, because the laywer attacked the dyslexic man.

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"Did you eat your veggies?" asked the shark, sarcastically.

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Why did the blonde walk into the wall? I lied it was nathaniel nugnes

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What's the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue

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What do you get when you cross a canary and a lawnmower? Nothing. A canary is a small bird, and a lawnmower is an inanimate object. Any procreation of this sort would likely produce no offspring.

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Marrage s like a card game. You start off with 2 hearts and 1 diamond. You end up wishing for a club and a spade!

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If you like this, it will have one extra like

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a cucumber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops