Your mums a penis joke.

Today is my birthday.... Goodbye cruel world

Why did the football coach go to the bank? To make a deposit.

They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

What's the difference between a model and a baby? I didn't have sex with a model last night.

What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Jew? The Bucket.

Struggling with self esteem? Wish you were more attractive? Well stop wishing you fugly cum dumpster.

What is the difference between a cow and a clam one is bivalve and one is a mammal

A woman walks into a bar.

why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

What is the difference between a dead baby in a blender and a rock? There are many differences. One of them is the fact that I don't masturbate to a rock.

So this old redneck is sitting on his porch when he sees this boy walking down the road and hollers "What you got there boy?" "Chicken wire." "What you gonna do with that?" "Gonna catch me some chickens." The old guy thought: Dumb boy. You can't catch no chickens with chicken wire. Later that evening he sees the same boy walking with a bunch of chickens. The next day he sees the same boy walking with duct tape. "What you got there boy?" "Duct tape" The boy replies. "Gonna catch me some ducks." The old man leaned back and thought. "Dumb boy, you can't catch ducks with duct tape." Later that evening he sees the boy walking with a bunch of ducks. The next day he sees the same boy and hollers: "What you got there boy?" "I got me some pussy willow." The old man hollers: "Hold on, let me get my hat."

What did the tomato say to the ketchup? Nothing both vegetables and condiments are inanimate objects, therefore cannot speak

What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

What's black and flies? Whatever it is, it's not a car.

captcha: all yer base

Why didn't peyton manning's grand mom call him after his game? She died of throat cancer 5 years ago

Why didn't the black guy where a seat belt? I don't know but he should've because hes dead.

Adam Claypool walks into a bar. He immediately sucks the bartender's dick because he is the biggest queer anyone has ever seen

What do you do when a black man points a gun at your face? you do what he tells you to do.

What's funnier than a dead baby? Everything.

Yo mamma is so weird most people try to avoid her.

You know what they called Obama in highschool? Nigge*

sometimes i wonder why is the frisbee getting bigger? then it hits me

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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