When life throws you melons you might be dyslexic.

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What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

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A man walks into a bar.....OW!

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Why can't George Washington drive? Because he died!

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No, I do not have the will, I have a family now, I make a living writing fiction, and well, play a small role in keeping not national, but worldwide stability in such things as the economics. The thing is, that you are renegades, you do not break the law, but you like to do things your own way, that gets you enemies among the so called "paragons" in the face of society and media. Its just like back in the days, if CIA, The Feds, Interpol and such are known as the "Paragons of civilization" or "the good guys" if you prefer, they can point towards you guys, and say "these are evil", and then nothing can stop them.

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I could even argue that having blood on your penis is kinda fun sometimes.

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What is black, often hung by a rope on a tree, and something white people like to play with? A tire swing.

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Why was the little girl crying? Her father has been abusing her and her mother for a year now.

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why was little bobby sad? he accidentally super-glued Jupiter to his forehead.

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Why can't Brent speak at the moment? Because he is eating his ice-cream.

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Mirror mirror on the wall. Why can't I see?

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. A farmers walks by underneath, and the squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because squirrels can't talk and neither can owls. Then the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

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A kid walks into a ctholic school and asks about the therory of evolution.

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What did the cat say to the dog? - meow!

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A baptist priest walks into a bar with a boner.

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What would make a black guy sad? His mom dying on death bed...

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

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IU football

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Suzie hates cancer, Her granny got killed by a driver that suffered from it

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Making a good analogy is like making a chocolate sundae; either way there are simply no reindeer left, and the glass of water you once had is now gone.

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You want to know how I know you're gay You want to have sex with a person of the same sex

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A Mexican, an Italian and an American all walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have pleasant conversation, and all return home to loving families safely and securely.

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What Does the Duck Say? "Got any grapes?"

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what do a plane and a mouse have in common? nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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