(Pretend that your adopted, and no one loves you) Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents.

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My sister had a lemonade stand once. And one time, she spilled.

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What did Frieza say to Vegeta after killing his parents? "I killed your parents."

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why do girraffe's have long necks? because my foot is so far up all their asses that it hits their head, pushing it away from the body.

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Knock Knock Whos there Who Yan Who Yan Who Chow Yan Chow

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there is a mexican and a black guy in the back of a car, who is driving? The cop

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do you know that joke? hmm no.. yaa life!

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Who took the last can of soda? I dunno.

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Why are lizards broke? Because they run around the desert with no money...

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What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run, 'cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!

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Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

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Roses are red Here is something new Violets are violet NOT FUCKING BLUE

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"I like my women like I like my coffee, in a cup." -Paul Alangadan

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An Irish man walks into a bar. He then sits down and enjoys his favorite drink.

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What's black and blue and lives in a kitchen? A 1940's housewife.

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Random Guy: "Oh god, why was I born with so much common sense?" God: "You must be mistaken, or else you wouldn't be asking me."

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F: what is BLUE and has 400 whells ? Q: NOTHING !!!

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A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

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there is a black guy riding a bicycle. he is extremely skilled on it and says he has never fallen off.

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a hobo begs and begs for a dollar to buy something. a man finally gives him a dollar. what does the hobo buy? nothing. he walked into 711 and got shot.

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Kevin was very nervous going into his job interview. So he pretended he was a salad and ate himself.

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Why was the boy afraid of the dark? he was blind

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What do you call a guy who died in a stampede? Grandpa.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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